About Lori

I was born “ Lori Ruth Rudningen”. The third of four children of Winfield and Sandra Rudningen. I was the “baby” of the family until my brother Wayne was born in 1969. I was about four weeks shy of my sixth birthday when he came to life, I was about five months short of seven when God had the audacity to call him home to heaven. Life went on without our little brother, but it was never the same.

The death of my baby brother touched each of us in our own way, sadness overwhelmed me in more ways than I was able to deal with. I strived for perfection but never quite reached the mark for my own satisfaction. There were many mud puddles in the path of the marathon of life I was running through, yet somehow I was able to rinse of the muck and continue the race.

I’m 49 years old; I’ve struggled with an eating disorder for 35 of them.

My desire to organize, rearrange, clean, and or take control has never taken a back seat to anyone. I truly wish to make everything in Gods world a masterpiece to behold from a clean bathroom to a beautifully painted picture. When there is work to be done it rarely has to wait for my attention, I see it and therefore I tackle it. Unrestrained at most, when I work I work hard, I finish what I start. Nothing feels better than a hot shower after an afternoon of digging in the dirt, sweating profusely manicuring my little piece of Gods handiwork, my yard.

My creative side likes to put a twist on the ordinary, I desire to see things at their best, I tend to try and perfect the imperfect. I like to make it count. My heart is filled with love that cries from the extremes of happiness and sadness. My boys carry more clout than they will ever realize. In light situations I talk with endless chatter, when there’s a need for seriousness I tend to debate with caution. I’m arguementive although I listen and follow direction when I understand the reasons why…. All that I’ve written is true, although until recently, I couldn’t have brought myself to put it on paper, I saw only my flaws. In the recent past I’ve discovered a new side of myself, I’ve come to know the person within the eating disorder. I’ve always known it’s important to be honest with others, but more importantly, I now know I have to be honest with myself. I thank God for second chances to try to right our wrongs. I thank God for the unconditional love I carry for, and recieve from my boys…

I’m Lori Ruth Cotten…I’m a survivor.

Published on August 7, 2009 at 2:59 pm  Comments (7)  

7 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Happy Holidays! My name is Lisa Hope and I am the assistant editor of Disorder.org. I am contacting you today in hopes of developing a strategic partnership with your website; we have seen your site and think your content is great. Disorder.org is an online gateway for people to find information regarding disorder diagnosis, symptoms, and treatment — and is continually adding content. More specifically, Disorder.org is starting a campaign to promote awareness about eating disorders of all types. If you’re interested in a partnership, please contact me at lisa.disorder.org@gmail.com.

  2. Lisa,
    Thank you for the compliment, I will be in touch although I’d like to know more about your project before I jump into anything. Merry Christmas, Lori

  3. Hi Lori, I just saw your post. I’ve been writing about my ED for a few yrs now. I am trying to survive too. Thanks for your writings…it helps 🙂

    • Hello Joanna, I think it helps to put in front of you, it forces you to deal with the reality of it all. Before I found the help I needed I was always able to place it all behind a curtain, Now I can’t…. actually, now I don’t want to anymore.!! I wish you happiness and goodness!! take care:)

  4. Many thanks for your submission, previously interesting and compelling. I found my way here through Google, I’ll return over again 🙂

  5. Lori, I’m so glad to have stumbled onto your blog. My eating disorder also developed when I was 14, and it already feels like it’s been an eternity even though for me that was only 11 years ago. I look forward to reading more of your insights and experience. Take care!

  6. Lori,

    Thank you for your bravery in telling your story. I have a similar story… as I am sure that there are a number of us. I am 43, it has been 31 years. I will be back to read more about your story.

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