I’ve been doing some proofreading on my story, it’s amazing how much I learn from myself as I continue to write, proofread and organize my thoughts on paper (computer) I was especially proud of this particular paragraph…..

I’ve had to take another break from this writing. It’s been two weeks since I wrote last.  I despise this part of my life and find it very depressing to relive as I write about it.  Nevertheless, I will press on as I feel it’s necessary for me to get things out. Writing has been therapeutic in a way.  Writing down my feelings, thoughts, and emotions helps me to figure out where the insanity of the eating disorder came from. Although the puzzle is far from being finished, I’m making progress. I’ve come to realize that my insecurities I felt in my childhood have shaped my thoughts and burned a strong path in my brain. Every time I feel threatened in any way, I am suddenly consumed with depression and the self loathing where as, eating disorder thoughts are boosted ten fold. Why are these thoughts so real, why are these thoughts and feelings so strong?  When I can answer that without hesitation, maybe then I will be free from this prison of depression and the fear of becoming fat.

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